2021 was a boundary-pushing year in every way. It required me to stretch, grow and launch into things I could have never imagined. Like most of us, I started 2021 with an overwhelming sense of relief that 2020 was in the dust. I was both excited and hesitant about what would come next. I thought to myself that after the hell that was 2020 there was absolutely no way that it could get any worse so I was optimistic…mostly lol.

I intentionally prayed for a focus word for 2021. I knew that I needed something dynamic to help push me forward. As a result, my focus word was “Be Boldy Courageous” and my anchor scripture was Joshua 1:9.

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid;do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” -Joshua 1:9 NIV

It is almost unbelievable the way that those words materialized in my life. I lived 365 days outside of my comfort zone. It seemed as if everyday I was presented with the opportunity to cling to what was familiar and “safe” or embrace the process of facing my fears. While, I didn’t always choose courage, the wisdom I gained during the process was priceless. Here are seven of the most impactful lessons I learned in a year of being Boldly Courageous.

God Is Preparing Me For What I Prayed For:

Yours Truly, Bear Mountain Park, Bear Mountain, NY. 2021.

I do not like to wait. This was my biggest challenge in 2021 because waiting seemed to be the gift that kept on giving. Just about everytime I thought I had reached the end of my waiting, it seemed as if the stop clock restarted. I found my self angry, tired, frustrated and if I could only use one word to sum it all up…weary. I did not want to wait anymore, I wanted what I wanted and I wanted express shipping. Maybe its because I am the youngest child, or maybe its because of the hyper-instant gratification society we live in, but I was exhausted and in my exhaustion I pulled away from God (worse idea ever). Fortunately, God is faithful and He didn’t allow me to slip from His grasp. Instead, He reinforced that “Not Now” and “No” are not synonymous. He began to show me all of the ways that I still was not ready for what I was praying for. The most obvious reason? I lacked patience, the very thing I would need to sustain what I was waiting to receive. Whew! In hindsight, I see that God wasn’t playing some cruel practical joke on me. No, like a good Father He was giving His baby girl milk before meat.

2. Our Expectations Can Break Our Own Hearts:

I cannot count on one hand how many birthday parties, celebrations, dinners, family events, weddings, graduations, and gatherings I have seen cancelled within the last two years. I, like most of us have had to adjust and readjust my plans and expectations time and time again. There were moments where it was simply annoying and others where I was devastated and overwhelmed with the grief that comes with the death of expectations. The thing is no one, including and especially God, had promised me that life would go exactly as I had envisioned it. I learned the very hard way that when I place my expectations in things going as I planned them, I swing the door wide open for disappointment. The lesson here, put your hope in God, not your plans. Which leads me to my next lesson learned..

3. It Really Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect to Be Beautiful:

Yours Truly. Bishop Art District, Dallas, TX. 2021.

I’m not sure if I am the only one who this happens to but it seems that every time I make very detailed and specific plans (usually for my birthday) it never goes quite the way I anticipated. My plans are almost always altered. The lesson that God continues to teach me is that life does not need to go perfectly to be enjoyed and cherished. As a matter of fact, it was the moments that I couldn’t have planned even if I tried that made my year so unbelievably memorable. Memories of dancing, singing and laughing obnoxiously in a Dallas Supermarket to Taylor Swift’s “You Belong With Me” with my best friends. Or, cancelling my plans for the day (while on vacation in Dallas) and instead choosing to spend the day handing out food, praying and listening to the stories of members of Dallas’ homeless community. Bike riding with my family on Saturday mornings, three generations deep. Or, being woken up at 2am on July 4th, to a loud noise only to peek out my window and see the most amazing fireworks. These moments were unplanned and some required me to let go of the reins, but boy were they beautiful.

4. People Are God’s Greatest Gift To Us

My sister and I. Downtown Dallas, TX. 2021.

Without a doubt, 2020 and 2021 were both family-focused years. Everything from being quarantined with my family to dealing with the pain of losing loved ones pushed me towards the people I love the most. I learned to cherish moments and to capture them whenever and wherever I could. I realized that if I had to choose between an experience that I desired or creating memories with the people I love there truly is no choice at all. People, our friends and family they make life beautiful. Building bonds and experiencing life with those who we love makes life worth living. Yes, I will be the first to admit that those closest to us can drive us nuts! But stop and reflect on your very best moments of 2021…who were you with? Would it have been the same if that person/those people hadn’t been there?

5. I’m Much More Powerful Than I Could Have Ever Imagined

2021 forced me to come face to face with myself. It was as though the year was a craftily designed maze of mirrors. I had to face some ugly truths. I walked a path that required rest stops of healing and some of them were insecurity, anger, and hazy boundaries. On the other hand, I also uncovered beautiful revelations about myself. I found that I have a knack for encouragement, one that I’ve never noticed because it comes naturally. I learned that my words carry so much life, and that my very presence changes atmospheres. I found that I’ve barely scratched the surface where the gifts that God has given me are concerned. In the end, I realize that I am not only strong, but much more powerful than I could have ever imagined and I gave myself permission to continue to push my own boundaries. No, I’m not tooting my own horn, I am just seeing that God meant it when He said I was made in His image.

6. The Presence of Fear Does Not Suggest The Absence of Faith:

Yours Truly, Bishop Arts District, Dallas, TX. 2021.

One of the things I learned in the maze of mirrors this year is that I had allowed fear to serve as a paralytic agent in my life. Anytime I was afraid, I became paralyzed knowing that I couldn't go back, but also refusing to move forward. I thought that in order to be faith-filled fear could not be present. In my soul searching, I was able to pinpoint “the unknown” as the source of my fear, and I realized that in life moments of not knowing what is on the other side of a decision is inevitable. So if the unknown and the fear that comes with it is unavoidable, and remaining paralyzed was not an option, the only thing I could do was move forward while afraid. I learned that if fear wasn’t on the table and if I was certain that my next move was guaranteed success, I wouldn’t need faith at all.

7. The Only Person Standing In My Way Is… Me:

My biggest takeaway from 2021 is that sometimes the things in our lives that look like Goliaths are only magnified because of the distance. Once you muster up the courage to be bold you will see the only giant standing in your way is you. There were so many opportunities and adventures that I had previously shied away from because the task at hand seemed mountainous. I convinced myself that it was impossible to succeed and therefore, safer not to try. Boy oh boy, was I wrong! When I made the decision to embrace fear and uncertainty and move forward anyway it changed my year and my life. In hindsight, I realize that while many of these new tasks were intimidating they were not at all as frightening as I had convinced myself in my mind. I had fallen for an optical illusion, the only giant standing in my way was me.

Note To Reader: Hey Beautiful! As I end this year in reflection and look forward to 2022 with hopeful expectation, I want to take a moment to thank you personally. Thank you so much for following along my journey this year as I walked a path where boldness and courage collided. This blog was by far the biggest leap I had taken in a long time when I published it. You reading it today is proof that God is faithful. Your continued support means much more than you could ever imagine. I am so excited to share my words with you in this new year. I am praying for you and I am hopeful that this will be your best year yet!

2021: Seven Things I Learned In A Year of Bold Courage