No More Hiding
“Be as wide and as deep, and as free as God called you to be.”
You don’t honor God by doubting yourself.
It doesn’t show humility.
You don’t honor others by making yourself small.
You honor God by believing in Him; believing so deeply in His power at work in you that you get out of the boat of limitations and walk on the water towards Him.
Read that again.
So why do so many of us shy away? Hide or shrink?
The Opinions of Others
We have a tendency to want to appease others by fitting into their expectations of us. Trust me, growing up in church as the daughter of a preacher I know this fully well.
At an early age I learned that in order to be perceived as a “good” and “holy” Christian I had to consistently present myself in a certain way, and if I didn’t I risked being deemed a heathen. I shared similar experiences throughout my academic and musical career where I was often the only, or one of few black females in the places and space God had allowed me to be. So every week I’d put on the mask of “pretty and polite”; a mask that had been handed to me. I never dared to step out of the box that had been built around me.
The problem was, I was so much more than just pretty and polite and the stained glass box I was in began to feel like a suffocating prison. I knew that it was time to do what I had never done before; show up as me. Just me.
Here’s the thing, people will always formulate a version of you that they are most comfortable with. They will make decisions about who you are, what you’re capable of, and expect you to live within the parameters of of their often limited expectations.
Friend, let me encourage you that it is not your responsibility to keep up with the persona others have placed on you. Rather, it is your responsibility to step fully into the identity that God has given you. The Bible says, “it is better to obey God than man.” When we choose to shrink, hide, and shy away from the fullness of who we truly are we dishonor the role, call, purpose and the people that God has assigned to us.
Let’s take a look at Moses in the Bible, a man caught between two nations, yet firmly planted by God. The Egyptian‘s viewed him as an Israelite and the Israelites viewed him as an Egyptian. In both scenarios he was treated as an outsider. His unique heritage and upbringing did not fit into the limited box that the people around him had labeled him in.
This created both internal and external turmoil for Moses and as a result he hid from his purpose for 40 YEARS. Meanwhile, the children of Israel continued to suffer in slavery for an additional four decades, because the man God had chosen to deliver them was in hiding. Think about that. Through Moses’ story we learn that there are people whose deliverance, freedom, and future depends on us stepping into the light.
Rehoboth: There Is God Given Room For You
Here’s a fun fact. Well, maybe it’s not all that fun; I was bullied intensely as a child. The reoccurring theme was “Nseandra thinks she’s “all of that”. To this day I am not entirely sure what that means (lol). Inevitably after being told consistently that I was too much of this, or not enough of that I figured it’d be better if people couldn’t see me at all.
I created my very own invisibility cloak, or so I thought. I schooled myself on how to remain unnoticed, unseen; essentially a wallflower. After all, if they couldn’t see me then they wouldn’t have anything to say….right? Let me skip to the end and tell you I was wrong!
The end result was that I became a scared, insecure, and timid girl who so desperately wanted to hide, but also desperately wanted to be seen. I learned to be silent, to make myself small. It certainly didn’t help that I graduated elementary school as the second tallest girl in the graduating class, and the 3rd tallest person overall. Needless to say, despite my best efforts I was still extremely visible. What I now know is that was by design.
One story in the Bible that has captivated my attention recently is found in Genesis 26. It’s the story of Isaac digging up the wells that his father had left him as an inheritance. For reference in the Bible wells symbolized provision, prosperity, abundance, and wealth.
Every time he attempted to dig the well he was met with opposition. That was, until he came across well #3. He named this well “Rehoboth” meaning, “God has given us room, and we will flourish.” Beloved, today God is saying Rehoboth to you. There is a space that is designated just for you. A space that is your inheritance from God.
Insecurity, Doubt & Unbelief
If you’re anything like Moses or myself then you may look at all of the things that make you imperfect and think there is no way you can conquer the mountain of purpose God has for you. You may believe that you’re not enough for the tasks ahead. Well, I’m happy to tell you, you’re right! The truth is none of us are enough for the God-sized purpose we have been given. At least, not in our own strength. BUT, with God we are limitless.
He is the One who equips us for the purpose He has called us to. We can rest, assured that if God has asked us to do something it is only because: 1) He is with us and has walked ahead of us and, 2) He knows that through His strength we are capable.
Beloved, allow me to affirm the fact that you are meant to take up space, the space that God, Himself has allotted to you. You are meant to make noise so that the world around you can hear God’s voice through you. You are meant to create resistance, so that the evil that threatens this world can be confronted by the power of God. You are meant to be seen so that God’s light can shine through you.
It is time to stop shrinking. It’s time to stop hiding, stop shying away from the purpose God has called you to. The fact is the evil one will always try to convince you that you are not, and do not have enough. It’s a lie. Additionally, there will always be those who simply do not have the capacity to hold the fullness of who you are, and that is okay. For the ocean cannot shrink itself to fit into the confines of a pond.
Step out of the boat Beloved, and into the limitless waters. Be as wide, as deep, and as free as God has called you to be. There is room for you just as you are.
